Why Why Why Why Why, BET, Why?

If you didn't know.... I was really sick for the last few weeks. And... while I have abstained from television since March of this year, it is an easy habit to fall back into. Something comforting about the flickering, ever-moving lights, the sounds. I will kick the habit again soon, but.... man.

So.... I watched the first 20 minutes of the BET awards replay last night, and then flipped back and forth... I loved Will and Jada, as usual, I hated just about everybody else (the NEW people) lip-synching, shiny-suiting, flashy-lighting, and pyro-exploding so that nobody will bother to look for talent, depth or meaning.

A few things were confirmed for me.

John Legend is overrated.

He should not be rated at all.

I cannot wait for his 15 minutes to be up.

Missy Elliot needs to stop making music IMMEDIATELY. I am thinking of circulating a petition.

I really do not like Beyonce. I can't wait until she gets old. She is one of the most annoying humans I have ever been forced to have an opinion about.

Any artist that gains INSTANT FAME is likely going to suck. So many of the performers at this award show will be forgotten (hopefully) within 5 years (John Legend, Ciara, Mike Jones, and whoever that Sambo Gospel Group was at the end)

People will buy (and buy INTO) anything.

A woman as CEO of BET will likely bring ZERO change in the misogynistic programming, just as having a BLACK MAN did not prevent BET from being a constant source of negative images of Blacks.

Over the last year or so, I have deepened my admiration of Will Smith. ESPECIALLY with him putting his career on the line to speak against the war on Iraq, Afghanistan and Terror. He has spoken very openly on racism in the country, and within our political system, and the little bit I saw of him (and Jada) was really funny.

So... I found this while surfing, I thought it was funny, I hope y'all can enjoy it as much as I did.

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I'm sure many of you caught the BET awards and while I thought it was one of the better BET award shows and that Will and Jada did a great job of hosting (their rules were hilarious), I just had a few "Why's" to throw out there:

Why didn't somebody tell beyonce that you could see her undergarment clear as day during their ghetto, inappropriate stripshow?

Why is nick cannon forever trying too hard to be funny and ends up coming off as corny?

Why is gladys knight's voice STILL better than half the performers we have today?

Why hasn't alicia keys gotten a personal stylist yet? please stop using your girlfriend from highschool to dress you.

Why did remy ma look a hot mess? is that a man?

Why did mariah carey look like she couldn't walk in her shoes? and
Why did she look all puffed up in the face? she's an extra medium.

Why did omarion have his baby hair (circa ginuwine 98) slicked down going into his sideburns? that is not cute.

Why was i happy that ciara was lip synching?

Why did michael jordan look like he had on a zoot suit? ALL that money looking like bishop magic don juan. get a custom tailor.

Why are will & jada like the perfect couple?

Why does everyone call on sheila e whenever they need some percussion? is she the ONLY black person we got that plays? further,
Why does she still look good after all this time?

Why was teena marie's dress riding up with every verse of her poem? and why did she reference "passing the joint?" she is the original wigger.

Why doesn't faith get rid of those biker chick tatoos all over her body already? she looks horrible when she has on a formal gown and then biggie's baby mama" inked across her left breast get in touch with a laser removal specialist.

Why is toni braxton STILL the bomb? but i ask, why was she laying the deep, breathey, barely-understand-what-i'm-saying mode of singing on extra thick? this is a tribute, toni.

Why do i hate when mary j blige starts to dance? and why does she associate screaming with singing?

Why does fantasia all of a sudden look ghetto to me?

Why was NOBODY feeling that obnoxious gospel group? "NO WAY" they should've booked you.

Why did mike jones need to bring his entire neighborhood on stage - ruining the show for me all together.

Why does leon always have a front row seat to anything BET does? Who is he sleeping with over there b/c he hasn't worked since the Temptations movie.

Why does gabrielle union always look the same?

Why is monique pregnant with twins and YOU CAN'T TELL?

Why does everyone refer to missy as this pioneer, but the last few albums she's put out has just been a throwback to old beats in the 70s & 80s. that ain't trailblazing.

Why did Will and Jada plug the show as a family show in commercials and yet, 10 minutes into the show they were bleeping out some of Lauren Hill's lyrics?

Why didn't Lauren Hill cancel her performance if she knew she wasn't going to be able to sing...one note?

Why did Mariah Carey look like she was having a nervous breakdown as she was singing her song? Was it me or did she look EXTREMELY uncomfortable or upset or both?

Why did Destiny's Child thank God when they received their award and then proceed to do a lap dance in their performance when it clearly violated the third rule spelled out by Will and Jada?

Why did they show Vivica Fox like...a gazillion times?

Why is it that most of the artists who received awards weren't even there? Didn't they ask them to RSVP? Didn't anyone make follow-up calls?

Why was someone constantly correcting the information on the teleprompter or in biographical video clips?

Why doesn't BET use some of the money they make from their T&A videos and put it towards tigher production? (granted this year was probably better than most. I mean, the TV image only screwed up a few times)

Why did the brother who would come from behind stage to hand people the nomination envelopes look like an intern who didn't realize that he would be expected to come out and hand out those envelopes?

Why did it always sound like there was a fight going on when folks were presenting the awards--what was all that damn noise about?

Why is it that when the camera panned the audience folks were almost always walking around in the aisles like they were at a party?

Why didn't anyone come out and brief the audience that some of them would be caught on camera so they should look as though they were having fun at all times and not look pissed when Gladys performed because she wasn't Kiara or 50 Cent?

Why was Tom Cruise on BET for the second time this month?

Why does Tom Cruise always look like he's afraid for his life when he's on BET?

Why did Will Smith's father from the Fresh Prince give him dap that looked like a secret gay hug?

Why did Jada look like a miniature drag queen at times?

Why did Stevie Wonder sing John Legend's song better than John Legend? (okay, I hate John Legend's voice so maybe it's just me)

Why didn't I know John Legend was gay?

Why doesn't John Legend seem to know he's gay?

Why are we still giving Alicia Keys award after award?

Why was 65-year old Gladys Knight the best singer and performer of the evening?