It all started with one innocent picture....

 This one.

Seriously. I'm running on intolerant mode lately and I do attack viciously when provoked.

While I'm not a "hacker" per se, I do have some fairly remarkable skills when needed. I'm not convinced dude on this page is Black to begin with, but if he's a friend of yours, let him know he has 24 hours to issue an apology for disturbing me, or I will..... make things very entertaining for my Myspace audience.

From:	Ready 4 R.. http://www.myspace.com/ready_4revolution
Date:	Nov 28 2006 9:54 PM
Subject:	No Subject
Body:	Only a fool would do what you are doing - To Disgrace Malcolm and use the "n" word is a crime. You need to cease the madness

Being the mature individual I am, I sent him a simple suggestion.

Thanks.
Please ignore me from now on.

He continues...

From:	Ready 4 R.. http://www.myspace.com/ready_4revolution
Date:	Nov 28 2006 9:59 PM
Subject:	No Subject
Body:	Why in the hell did you replace Dr. King's photo to perpetrate your madness - you are a disgrace to the race and need to stop the madness. Our People need genuine Revolutionaries dedicated to bringing about a better quality of life free from exploitation and oppression not blood suckers who are doing the bidding for the enemy...

Hmmm, so I simply reply with a...

Seriously, sir.
Ignore me. It's better for you.
I, like most of MySpace it seems, have absolutely no interest in exchanging with you.

I know... but seriously, read dude's page. It's not THAT low of a blow.
And, as I expected, it frustrated our new homosexual stalker.

From:	Ready 4 R.. http://www.myspace.com/ready_4revolution
Date:	Nov 28 2006 10:05 PM
Subject:	RE: RE: No Subject
Body:	HELL UNTIL YOU TAKE mMALCOLM OFF THE SITE YOU WILL HEAR FROM US - MATTER OF FACT WE ARE GONNA LAUNCH A CAMPAIGN AGAINST YOU

From:	Ready 4 R.. http://www.myspace.com/ready_4revolution
Date:	Nov 28 2006 10:08 PM
Subject:	You're an Enemy of AFRIKAN PEOPLE
Body:	Oh hell no we are not gonna ignore you rather we are gonna declare WAR because we love Malcolm and won't allow low life scum like you to degrade him so you are warned to change tha photo or suffer the consequences of our campaign to Smash you

To smash me? Dude, my page is private. He can't even see my page!!!

From:	Ready 4 R.. http://www.myspace.com/ready_4revolution
Date:	Nov 28 2006 10:22 PM
Subject:	LONG LIVE MALCOLM - SMASH CONFUSION!!!!
Body:	Oh Hell No we won't ignore your confusion.You have been warned and if you don't heed our call we will do everything to crush you. We Love Malcolm and will do everything we can to expose haters like you. We advise you to cease and desist the usage and manipulation of the Malcolm X - Dr. King photo. We are prepare to launch a campaign to expose, crush and bury you. Please don't take what we are saying light because you don't understand how much we love Malcolm. We are Malcolm's soldiers and we stand ready to defend him against low life scum like yourself who are mere opportunist spreading confusion.

The moral of the story is, if you know dude, you should holler at him.
I'm a nice guy, a fun guy. Life of the party when I want to be.

Ask around.

But I don't respond well to threats.

I will find his personal information.
I will post it all over every area of the internet. Especially the gay part.

He will have to change his phone number, address, and occupation. Maybe his name.

I look forward to it.

So holler at your homeboy if you know him.

"The N Word"

They now want to ban the n-word.

How about a ban on rape?

Or black-on-black crime?

Oops, I forgot, according to the Black Intelligencia, as declared in 1995, there is no such thing as black-on-black crime. We were stupid for buying into that "creation of the racist white media."

I don't allow anyone to call me one.

And as many have noticed, I use the word, but only when referring to one.

I don't think it's the root of our problems. I think ignorance is. And pride in ignorance. And a lack of manhood. And no fathers. And no understanding of history. And drugs. And alcohol. And malt liquor. And misogyny. And self-hate. And Kanye West, Gay-Z, Snoop, Method Man, Clear Channel, The Army, Navy, Air Force and Marines.

And Jesus. Not the real Jesus, but the Santa Claus-like idol the white man has created.

Our problems are bigger than niggers.

Black people FEAR and LOVE the white man more than we fear and love ourselves.

You doubt me?

Black people will kill black people over a stepped on shoe, looking at somebody "the wrong way", talking about them on a rap record, or an inadvertant bump in a crowded nightclub.

In my West Oakland neighborhood, I witness the violence firsthand. The hatred, jealousy, and despair that too often ends in murder.

But no matter how desperate... these same seemingly "savage" negroes would never and WILL NEVER allow their violence to spread to the white folk who live so peacefully in this violent neighborhood.

You can call a nigga a King.
He's still a nigga.

You can call a nigga a Black Man, a GOD (God forbid), divine, Asiatic, whatever.
He will still rob, beat, rape and kill a Black Woman. He'll break into your car while you sleep. He'll deny his children. He will fuck anything with a hole. He'll get high before he gets free.

You can be mad at me if you want to.
Or we can get over these damn dumb labels.

Poetry spots are filled with niggas. Dreadlocks, Red/Black/Green, incense burning, revolutionary jive talking coons.

It don't matter if you call him Trayvon Watkins or T'Shaka Rasool Azerbaijan.

White folks have a creepy, scary, wonderful way of getting us caught up with labels over content.

They have been SO successful, I can not help but to admire it. It's like rooting for the bad guy in a movie. If he's stylish, devious, and ridiculously successful, how can you not root for Darth Vader, Severus Snape or Lex Luther? (Gene Hackman, not Kevin Spacey's bullcrap performance in that piece of crap moviefilm.)

White folks have manged in the last 20 years to make slavery BLACK PEOPLE'S FAULT. Do I lie?

Slavery now, in college courses, talk radio and internet blogs was now caused by warring, savage, darkie tribes. THEY are the ones who caught, captured, and sold "their own people" into bondage. Do I lie?

If we have our way, Michael Richards will be found guilty in the court of public opinion of being a..... racist.


If found guilty, he will be the first known racist in America since George Wallace in 1963.

Paul Mooney Is My New Dad

On Voting II

In this country.... 51% of the vote gets 100% of the power.

That is not a Democracy.

Remember that.



Instead of always trying to fight people into buying into a broken system.
Maybe we should take that energy and fight this crooked system.

The Bad Guy

So... the other night, at dinner, JLa, my ace, says to Nineveh, "That's my plan for you. That's what I want to help you develop over the next year."

I stopped mid-burrito. Stunned.

You mean I am not the only person who puts together development plans for people? You mean there is somebody else who sizes people up and says, "This is what you need to get where you need to be"?

I asked her at least five times, "what are you talking about?" just to be sure that I was witnessing what I thought I was.

I'm not the only one.

I've been doing it for years, most often with Black Women, but every once in awhile putting together a personal development plan for a Black Man when I can.

Most times, you can't tell people. Nin is the first person I have ever heard say, "I am just pleased that you care enough about me to  help me grow."

Most people ain't like that.

So you have to be covert. You have to disguise lessons as experience. Asking questions instead giving answers. Allowing people to come to the conclusions that you already know they should.

For me.... as a man, dealing with women in this way, it often makes me The Bad Guy.

People ask, "Man, what did you do to her?" when they learn of the *interesting* reactions many women in my life, what am I supposed to say?

"I fixed her. And she liked it."
Far too arrogant sounding, regardless of how accurate it may or may not be.

So I don't even tell people 90% of the crazy stuff that happens. For it always seems to make ME look bad.

In the last year, I actually kinda retired, deciding to focus on myself rather than developing self-esteem, pride, consciousness, God-Consciousness, discipline into grown folks.

But sometimes.... it is better to help someone and be The Bad Guy than it would be to leave her alone.

And I am in that situation now.


I met somebody a couple o' weeks ago. Gorgeous Sista, couple of degrees, good job, intelligent, funny, etc...

In my mind, I was half thinking she was too good to be true, and half thinking that maybe, possibly I had finally met HER.

The other night, our first conversation set me straight.
We talked for hours, about everything: politics, white folk, Black Folk, music, TV, mind control, racism, sushi, blue colors......

And if the conversation had ended at 11pm instead of 11:30, maybe things would be different right now.

But she said too much.

I asked her, innocently, what makes her such the incredible catch she bragged on being. Her reply:

"Because I'm really good in bed."

I waited for laughter that was not going to come.

But, I'm also an intellectual gangsta, so I recover in nanoseconds.

"How exactly do you know this, young lady?" I asked, with an intentional flirtatious hint in my tone.

"Everybody who has slept with me has said so."

"'Everybody?' Don't you mean 'the people' or preferably 'the one person or two people who have been special enough to find out'?"

"No... I mean everybody. Without exception, each and every one."

Nobody knows I'm a virgin. I guess I don't look like one. Or talk like one. It's amazing how often this plays into my favor.

My ex is still mad at me. She says I should tell people upfront. I feel like women should tell me they are promiscuous upfront.

"Hi, I'm Jabir. I'm a Pisces, I like the funk band Cameo, reading, playing Scrabble, and you will never have sex with me."

Not my best pick up line.
(Not that I have ever used one anyways.)

I prefer to create a space where people are comfortable to tell me who they really are.

Sometimes, it leads to numerous people in Philadelphia telling me that Them Franchise Boys are in town if I'm interested.

Other times, it allows a woman to open up and tell me that in college she considered abstinence, but came to the conclusion that, "If they didn't sleep with me, they were going to sleep with somebody else." 

Anyways... any romantic possibilities are now gone. She doesn't know.

If I told her, she'd be OFFended and DEFensive.

And I want her to get something from me. Cuz that's how I am.

So this is how it will go. We'll go out, eat good food, have good conversations and shared experiences. I'll ask some questions, drop some hints, make some points.

I will be exactly who she thinks I am.

At some point, on some night, she will make the discovery.

"A virgin?"
"You?"
"But.... you look so... normal!"
"And you act so confident!"

And she'll feel kinda rejected at first, and then curious.
And after a couple of weeks, a few more conversations, my work will be done.
And I will be gone.

If a man can convince a woman to stand on the corner and sell her body for him... why can't a man do the opposite?

If it's all about the Gift of Gab, to convince a woman that she is worthless, to "break her down" as the pimps say...

Why should it be any different to build her up? To convice her that she is priceless? It's not.

I've been doing it for years. I am a manipulator, this is what I do.

Of course, there are consequences. I accept them.

She'll be mad at me for not wanting to be with her, especially after she comes to a major lifestyle change. She won't realize that she is not changing for me, she's changing for herself. Not at first.

I'll be The Bad Guy.
For a little while at least.

I'm not wrong, I'm not mean. I'm not using her. I would much rather just disappear now and concentrate on what I want to concentrate on.

But...  Change.

What helps people change and grow and mature?
Who helps people change and grow and mature?

I ain't preaching to nobody about right and wrong. I only offer advice to people close to me....

For the world, I'm content to just be an Example.
Tangible, Realistic, and Attainable.

For men.... sometimes you have to be somebody that they want to be.
But for women.... sometimes you have to be someone they want.


2010 Edit
It took me a lot of time and flashing back and flux capacitating to even remember who the "subject" of this was. UNBELIEVABLE when I think about how things worked out. Man plans. Allah Plans.

Allah is the Best of Planners.

Ask about it.

On Voting

I wrote this letter to a friend and figured I could share it with y'all.
She emailed me, complaining that none in her circle would vote, and she asked if I had any advice on what to say to them.

My response:

I voted.
Yes, I did. I always vote. Primary, whatever, I always vote.

However... I don't think not voting is the worst thing that somebody can do. Seriously. Voting in this country means at best, picking the worst of two evils, and it is impossible to motivate or be motivated from that point. I think "we" need to really figure out why so many of "us" do not vote.

Most people believe that voting doesn't change anything. Are they wrong?
Democrats won the House and could win the Senate. Is life now going to get easier for Black People? Are there going to be fewer murders in Oakland? More jobs? Hell, are we going to stop killing brown people around the world? No.

The same Democrats who are in "power" now are the ones who approved and validated every one of Bush's moves. Patriot Acts, 2 public wars and 3 silent ones, military budget, Black Child Left Behind. Nothing is going to change.

Yes, I think it's very trifling to not vote, on GP. But the majority of Americans don't.

Maybe they know something that we refuse to admit.

If y'all don't hear from me after tonight...

It is because I DIED of LAUGHTER at the movies TONIGHT.

Jamese and I are going to see "Borat" and it's already looking like a bad move for my health. I have been laughing out loud for no reason for the last 24 hours. I know that when the lights go down I am going to start shaking and giggling uncontrollably... this is a recipe for disaster.

Or as Jamese put it, this is a "double underwear film."

The rules have already been established. No eating before the film, visit the restroom as frequently as possible before it starts... and this may be the first movie that I don't bring $15 dollars in gobstoppers, pumpkin seeds, york peppermint patties, reese's peanut butter cups and nerds to. I do not want to die.

I've been a big fan of Ali G since he got a show on HBO, he's hilarious as Ali G, and ridiculous as Bruno, but BORAT has gained a special place in my life.

If you're not hip, or if you're just not ready, here are some clips of my man in action. Remember, he's hilarious enough on his own, but what makes it 1,000,000,000,000,000,000 times funnier is the fact that nobody knows it's a character. It's not scripted.

THROW THE JEW DOWN THE WELL!!!!!!!